Count the Times I Can Say Shimmer

In the lexicon of shimmer, there is a division between good shimmer and bad shimmer. Most shimmer ends up being bad shimmer or "mistake shimmer." It gets all over your hands and makes you look sweaty (on one end of the specturm) or like a sparkly member of a junior dance team. Products that disperse a perfect amount of light-reflecting particles give you that otherworldly j' ne se quois, making you look brighter, less tired and like you care the perfect amount about how you look. They exist, these products, but they're rare.



In summertime, you can get away with full-body shimmer if you're so inclined. I encourage you to try many of the widely available bronzing products. But if you are pale, like me, or if it's winter, you want to go easy. I found a product that is really expensive and seems to do nothin' much at first (sign me UP!). It's just a translucent goo that you spread all over your visage. But then it catches the light, delivers the subtlest most perfect amount of complexion smoothing, and makes you be in love with your face. YSL Tient Parfait (pic above). Also awesome: it comes in multicultural shades.

Retail Talk.

(Note: This blog is now also about working in a store. Thanks!)



My new thing is chasing you around the store when it's 10 minutes till close. I follow you and re-fold everything you are folding and re-hang everything you carelessly throw back on the rack. I keep a distance of about six feet between us, and the more annoying you are (like if you are on a cell phone, or if you mention casually that you "know the guys at Rag & Bone," the less distance I put between us.



Sound obnoxious? Well, also, in my mind, I'm pretending I'm a really bad private eye that's been hired to spy on you.

My Insolence

My Insolence? Really? Who thinks of Hillary Swank as Insolent? Tough, maybe headstrong, but not cheeky. Maybe she's trying to market herself as insolent, because it's the new classy. Anyway it smells like if you mixed together the entire Macy's perfume dept.

Oh, I think the diet industry is a little out of hand...

Because it's wormed it's way into lip gloss. For Chrissakes, people. This shit is out of control. Lip gloss that's labeled "guilt-free" explicitly implies that other lip gloss should make you feel guilty. Like, "Oh, Ive been good today, I think I'll indulge in some non-diet lipcolor. Whee! Ill just have to spend a couple extra minutes on the eliptical." This product is going into a new category here on Cheekbeauty: Offensive Products. What would lil' mama say?

Rainbow Right at Alexander Herchcovitch

This year Herchcovitch brilliantly accessorized his elegant all-black ensembles that opened the show with monochromatic neon eye makeup, colors that were echoed in the color block pieces* he showed later on. As Cheek's own wardrobe has darkened immensely in the past year, methinks of no better way to wear the new bright makeup.

*Note: "Peices" is what you call items of clothing that are more expensive than handguns.

Yellow Eyeshadow, Part Deux

Is saying "I totally called that, man!" akin to saying "I told you so!" and therefore mucho obnoxious-o? Because I saw three designers so far this fashion week who have hopped on the yellow eyeshadow wagon. From left: Ben Cho (who is amazing purely because he booked fave band Growing to play his show), the eco-conscious Behnaz Sarafpour, and Derek Lam. It's all so, so last August! No? Well, okay, I guess Derek Lam is probably too busy to read my blog, but still. I'm on the ball. So NEXT fall is gonna be all about um. RED eyeshadow! And the return of glitter! You heard it here.

OMG! Trailer for Baby-Mama

Cheekbeauty ♥'s Tina Fey, and Tina ♥'s Amy, and hooray for vehicles for women in comedy! Hopefully they're coming back to stay. Remember the days of Carol Burnett and Goldie Hawn? Good times. Also Tina's actual baby's name is Alice. Which is the most wonderful name ever, besides Aeronny and Jinty and Siense and Madyson-Caite. Enjoy.